I AIN'T NEED NO EDUMACATION

Sometimes the jokes write themselves:

crabfisherman: lol, Cheap attacks is all you offer Claus.
crabfisherman: Your no writer
crabfisherman: Your a rambling idiot.
Jesus Claus: I'm a good enough writer to know that it's "you're", not "your"
Jesus Claus: hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Jesus Claus: you're = you are
crabfisherman: whats wrong with your ?
Jesus Claus: hahahahahahaha
crabfisherman: I been useing your fer 45 years
Jesus Claus: classic
crabfisherman: I am not changing now.
crabfisherman: I am sticking with your
Jesus Claus: your is possessive, dumb ass
Jesus Claus: your car
crabfisherman: and ?
Jesus Claus: your butt plug
Jesus Claus: so what does the sentence "your a loser" mean?
Jesus Claus: my a loser?
crabfisherman: L
Jesus Claus: i own a loser?
Jesus Claus: it's incoherent
crabfisherman: It means you are a loser.
Jesus Claus: no
crabfisherman: It is easy for me to understand.
Jesus Claus: you're a loser means that
crabfisherman: yes
Jesus Claus: your a loser is incoherent
crabfisherman: it does
crabfisherman: Incoherent to you
Jesus Claus: hahahahahahahaha
crabfisherman: Bit I understand fully what the conveyor is trying to say.
Jesus Claus: ok, but you busted my brand new Irony meter by typing "your no writer"
Jesus Claus: that was fucking funny
crabfisherman: It should be you're no writer ?
bayarea1979: "You aint no writer"
crabfisherman: yea
crabfisherman: You aint no writer
Jesus Claus: any of those would be acceptable
crabfisherman: Mark Twaine was horable at english but he was an excellent writer
Jesus Claus: horable?

Most of you don't realize this, but crabfisherman's lack of education, generally dim demeanor, and pungent stench all have an interesting explanation. You see, crab was born to an aristocratic family in a small European country. His parents had high hopes that he would distinguish himself as a cultured and intelligent man. They eagerly perused catalogs from exclusive boarding schools as the infant crawled around the many rooms of their mansion. One fateful night, however, would change crabfisherman's destiny forever.

His parents wished to go on a vacation one summer, and so the family boarded a ship bound for the Strait of Gibralter and a leisurely cruise around the Mediterrenean. Sadly, this idyllic vacation was not to be. The ship was caught in a fierce storm, and was whipped and smashed against rocky shoals, sinking into the deep. All were lost, except for one: the infant crabfisherman. He was saved by a pod of jellyfish, and was raised as one of them. He grew taller, and was taught the ways of crabbing by his new family.

Today, we know this poor soul as crabfisherman. You can even detect his disgusting odor as he sluices into a PT room. You must forgive him his foul stench, and his paltry grasp of the english language. Raised among the sea creatures, he had virtually no exposure to normal human beings. He tries very hard to fit in, but as you can see from the above, his efforts are largely comical and unsuccessful. It seems as though he has been exposed later in life to conservative rhetoric, and it shows. He is obviously struggling to imitate political dialogue as best he can, and it is hard not to feel sad as he pitifully attempts to turn the few political slogans he managed to acquire into a full-fledged persona. In the end, his lack of education is painfully exposed, and he is left stunned and gasping.

Wait, there, in the distance, he's paddled out and rejoined his fellow jellyfish. I think he'll be more comfortable among his own kind. Some things were just not meant to be. Farewell, crabfisherman, and please, don't come back soon.

JC