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Thursday, February 28, 2008

BOBBY'S BACK

I can foresee a need for one of these...

Not two weeks ago, I heard Bobby Boom Boom McGee say he was finished arguing with people on Paltalk. Yet, tonight in MPIDC, he is again ranting and raving about the evil Joooz. Better get one of these ready, Bobby, you'll be needing it soon.

JC

OBAMARAMA VS. THE HILLARY-PILLARY






The most intriguing irony in watching the Clinton/Obama debates in MPIDC has been the virulent about-face that a surprising majority of the Paltalk womenfolk have undergone in just a few short weeks. To criticize Hillary in the early part of January would often bring on accusations of sexism and misogyny whereas today, to even mention that Barack wore a bad tie brings on the wrath of the ladies as if one had insulted their body-shapes. In publicly stoning their alpha-female it seems they are deferring the opportunity for a female president for another century or two. Woe that I neglected to copy/save some of the posts that have come my way in recent days.

To me, the issue has boiled down to political strategy 101: how do the Dems prevent Darth McCain from stealing the next election? It is not an easy question, however, if the Paltalk 'sample' is any reference, it would appear the grass-roots Dems have decided to use the bandwagon-strategy and shun and humiliate those who question whether Obama can win the presidency to the sidelines. Innuendo and outright accusations of racism are being hurled at anyone who shares the view that Obama is a very risky proposition in terms of the real electoral test in about nine months. Of course Hillary is a risky proposition too, given that the aforesaid Dems threw out their best chance in John Edwards some time ago. But amnesiac Americans seem to have overlooked how the real process works, particularly from the GOP side of the equation: Mr. Obama is wide-open for an assault on his character, his 'philosophy', and his past misdeeds in the same way that John Kerry was tasered in 04. It simply doesn't matter if the smear is true or not - trailer-brained Americans will buy it all as fact and they make up a huge electoral force both in peer influence and diebold lever-pulling. In my opinion Hillary has been thoroughly and brutally pre-trashed for years by the dark forces and there really isn't much more they can throw at her leaving her in a stronger position whereas Barack is still a relative smear-virgin, leaving him extremely vulnerable to unexpected broadsides.

I have the gut feeling that repugs and corpmedia are rubbing their hands at the prospect of the Dems ascending Obama as their cherished candidate.. From there his destruction would be a slow, steady, and expanding process of exposing him as simply too tainted and new to be considered for the highest office in the land. Obama has demonstrated a rather weak response to accusations of any sort thus far - but what if the Sinclair allegations are 'substantiated' by other creepy people with similar stories? I have already seen early indications of this oozing out of blogs etc. And there is the Rezko trial, conveniently just underway right now. What if Obama is exposed as having participated in shady land deals, cover-ups, and profiteering? There is high probability this trial will expose him to significant degradation regardless. These and numerous other petards may begin to explode shortly after Hillary drops out of the race, which could happen soon if she gets trounced next week. Paltalkians of course will discount them and assume anybody in their right mind would do so also. But that is naive. Mr. Obama is a sitting duck for all that is horrible about U.S. politics and every hint, assertion, and provable fact will stick like velcro to the minds of the semi-literate hordes.

I'll conclude by saying that even though I think both candidates are sub-par I genuinely hope I'm wrong; that Obama will squash McCain and go on to a productive presidency. Likewise for Hillary should she overcome the odds and become the nominee in reasonably legitimate fashion. But I can't escape the feeling that media and the GOP are engineering American minds for a default McCain win via Mr. O.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

GREAT MOMENTS IN CONSERVATIVE STUPIDITY, #3,564,335

2/27/08 - 2:35 AM EST

LUMINOL (on mic) - "Barack Obama wants to withdraw a brigade a month from Iraq. That'll take 4 to 5 years!"

# of troops in Iraq - 170,000
# of troops in a brigade - (according to LUMINOL) 5000
170,000/5000 = 34 months

So sorry, your answer was only off by a couple of years. Good luck repeating 5th grade math.

JC

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

GREAT MOMENTS IN CONSERVATIVE STUPIDITY, #3,564,334

2/26/08 - 8:39 PM EST:

tommyjohnson44: doesnt matter who you take money from you are beholding to someone

What we are BEHOLDING is that you are a dumbass. You should not feel BEHOLDEN to your teachers, they obviously failed you miserably.

JC

THEIST "LOGIC"

It's hard not to laugh out loud at the hysterical reasoning put forth by some theists. Have a look at these gems:

Tawk Soup: JUST HARD TO FATHOM THERE ISN'T A GOD ---- WHEN 9 MONTHS LATER ... A PERFECT 8 POUND BABY WITH ALL IT'S TOES AND FINGERS ENTERS THE WORLD HEALTHY

Tawk Soup: NALD --- HARD TO FATHOM THERE ISN'T A GOD ----WHEN THE " EARTH IS PERFECTLY PLACED 93 MILLION MILES FROM THE SUN ...... NOT TOO HOT .... NOT TOO COLD

What can one say about such lame attempts at rational thought? Oh my yes, it's a miracle when a baby is born, just like it happens every few seconds every day. This is a classic logical fallacy. Just because something IS a certain way, theists take that to mean it must have been DESIGNED that way, even though we know that the universe, both physically and biologically, functions according to natural laws. If those laws were different, then life as we know it would also be...wait for it...different!

Theists insist that those natural laws were designed, but they literally cannot wrap their tiny minds around the concept that those laws could just as easily be different, and we would be living in a universe where those DIFFERENT laws seemed absolutely perfect as well! In fact, I can't think of a scenario where some form of life somewhere, living under some set of natural laws, would not also think those laws perfectly designed for them. Clearly, this thought is too complex and abstract for a person like Tawk Soup to comprehend.

And how can it be significant that the Earth is the "perfect" distance from the sun to sustain our kind of life? Other planets may exist where other forms of life are thriving in their "perfect" environment. I can just imagine the Ejovidian version of Tawk Soup turning to his friend and glomphing, "Isn't it so amazing that our atmosphere is 70% methane and the temperature is -34 degrees? How perfect is that? It must be designed by the Great Tentacled One in the Sky!"

I really wish the level of reasoning from the average Paltalk theist would improve. Come on folks, you gotta bring your "A" game!

JC

THE SPIN MASTERS

Looks like Republicans are running short of ammunition for their smear tactics. Yesterday in Mainstream Politics in Debate Central tommyjohnson44 made the fatal mistake of trying to smear the New York Times by accusing them of lying about John McCain. As “proof” of his allegations he offered a link to one of those Republican tabloids that spin the truth until it’s unrecognizable. At issue was the article in the Times that recently drew fire from all the talking heads: For McCain, Self-Confidence on Ethics Poses its Own Risk.

As you can see by the title, the piece had little to do with McCain’s sex life but, rather, focused on his sometimes reckless disregard for the public image he’s managed to create in the minds of his constituents. It seems McCain would like people to believe that he’s a man of integrity and ethics – a hero in the struggle to halt the free flow of “soft money.” He’s even criticized members of his own party for taking what could be seen as bribes from special interest groups – free dinners, vacations, the use of private jets, etc. Yet a cursory glance at McCain’s personal life would cause the average person to question his role on the Senate Ethics Committee.

The piece offers a long list of behaviors that seem to contradict McCain’s public position on the role of lobbyists in Washington. My personal favorite is their account of the incident at the Willard Hotel where dozens of lobbyists were invited to a fund raiser for McCain’s 2000 bid for the White House. When Bush supporters gathered outside the building to mock the event, McCain’s team responded by pinning buttons on the lobbyists' shirts that read “McCain voted against my bill.”

The central argument of the piece is that McCain has grown so confident in the ability of his public image to deflect criticism that he pays little attention to the blaring contradictions he sets up with the company he keeps. His relationship to Vicki Iseman is offered only as an example of how he recklessly undermines his otherwise impeccable reputation as a man of ethics.
But, as you undoubtedly already know, neocons have a tendency to zoom in on anything that seems to suggest sexual impropriety, even if it's only a remote association. That’s about the only topic their limited intellects can handle.

So it’s no wonder that tommyjohnson44 failed to read the article and chose instead to rely on the Republican spin machine to give him the “facts,” namely that the Times had accused McCain of having an extramarital affair. In all fairness, I must say that the authors of the piece could’ve avoided any confusion had they chosen to mention Iseman in a later paragraph. But given their short attention span the neocons would’ve stopped reading after the first paragraph and missed the Iseman mention altogether, which brings to mind the oft repeated question on the part of one Paltalk chatter, kcgentz – Why oh why are republicans so stupid?

Blogged with Flock

BOUNCE N' POUNCE


Having been bounced from Mainstream today by @Carmen for pasting the dictionary definition of the word 'snigger' which means A disrespectful laugh, and for which she had dotted BigMac for using prior to my arrival, I have realized the error of my ways and thought I'd try to make it up to her by posting a jpeg of Barack being fitted for his inaugural suit. Carmen's very protective of her messiah and I also should have known better than to have questioned his infallibility in a post prior to the bounce :(

Monday, February 25, 2008

TOMMYTELETHON

You people eat this stuff?

tommyjohnson44 just demonstrated to the room the sad state of, at the very least, his personal economy, when he said:

"I'm jes' waitin' fer the price of crawfish to come down so I kin git some."

Now, I'm not that familiar with the commodity prices of what are basically underwater cockroaches, but it seems unconscionable that in the most prosperous nation in the world, people like tommyjohnson44 would need to choose between paying rent, utilities, or the succulent crunch of aquatic insects.

Please, won't you dig deep into your hearts and wallets, and contribute to The tommyjohnson44 Crawfish Fund? A watery bug is a terrible thing to waste.

Make checks payable to:

The tommyjohnson44 Underwater Cockroach Fund
c/o The Shady Pines Trailer Park, Lot 159
Booniesplat, LA, 44556

JC

Sunday, February 24, 2008

LAND MASS COMPARISON

Friday, February 22, 2008

FINALLY, A REPUBLICAN WITH CLARITY

kingkong62 just got off the mic in Mainstream, and I must admit I am happy to see there are some Republicans with a clear idea of what their party is. He said, among other things:

"McCain is a Bush cocksucker."
"The Republican party is a mess."

Bravo, my friend, I could not agree more. You may yet fight off that conservative infection.

JC

Thursday, February 21, 2008

THE SAD STATE OF LOUSYANA PUBLIC SCHOOLS

tommyjohnson44 is one of the dimmest bulbs in Social Issues. He was just on mic reading from a website, (which is obnoxious anyway) when he encountered the extremely difficult English word, "anecdotal," which he proceeded to pronounce, "ants-i-dotal," three separate times. Now mispronouncing a word once is no cause for alarm, but this is clearly how tommy thinks that word is pronounced. So very, very sad.

I fear for the future of public school students in the state of Lousyana if this is a representative sample of its products.

JC

JAY'S CORONATION

Lord Jay 156 cops a feel

Dateline Paltalkia - The Toodur royal family announced today the creation of Lord Jay 156, knight of Northumberland and Lower Mississippi. Reports confirm that the king used a ten foot pole rather than the traditional longsword, as, in his words, "The stench was nigh unbearable, wot wot."

Anonymous sources claim that Jay lobbied heavily for the elevation, primarily owing to his unrequited, and downright creepy, obsessive mancrush on LordMercifulVoo. As a commoner, jay_156 was ineligible for a formal marriage (and you know how eager he is to get into his white wedding gown). Unfortunately for Lord Jay, reports from Voo's camp indicate that the promised dowry, consisting of 3 decrepit mobile homes, ten roughly sexually abused sheep, and a rusted out Ford truck on cinderblocks, would not be enough to persuade Voo. Besides, he's not gay. At least not for that price.

Rumors persist that Lord Jay 156 intended to go to war to force the marriage to take place, but owing to the fact that Jay is a chickenhawk with an intense fear of fighting, war, horses, mud, pain, and strawberries, the planned invasion was scrapped.

More details to follow, as Jay is clearly not finished wooing his beloved...

JC

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

A word about the Election.....

Could someone explain to me why the whole fucking world believes that the Democratic party is split? I don't see it that way. I see two very strong leaders who are ready to take over from the current jackasses in the White House The repukes are running for cover because they have no one who can match up. Either way, America wins and big business loses.
Thank you.
ZM

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