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Friday, March 21, 2008

MEET THE YAPPERS



Name: MothersNaTiVE
Age: '80-something'
Location: Littlebigcasino, N.Dak.
Occupation: Walmart shopper
Astrological sign: Sky-buffalo
Car: Lincoln Navigator
Hobbies: Spending, buying things, getting stuff, cheese-carving, 'lakota heritage'
Favorite actor: Fred Thompson, Ronald Reagan, Fred Grandy
Favorite politician: the Bushes, the Cheneys, the McCains
Favorite color: Red, White, Blue
Favorite author: Zane Gray
Favorite food: blue corn mush, puréed prairie oyster, mashed twinkies
Pet peeve: sweat-lodge pervs, losing dentures, man-parts, Paltalk-taunters

Mothers is currently redecorating the double-wide 'teepee' in Walmart-chic with dozens of pink cushions, laminated furniture, and bric-a-brac 'far as the eye can see'. Rumor has it that she and Larry, the Walmart greeter, are planning marriage in December. Her summer plans are to shop and maybe drive to Bismark for some 'city-action'.

Paltalkers are grateful for Mothers's insights into native culture and her insistent and relentless defense of the Bush administration.

3 comments:

AUNTY KATE said...

Clumpy...you left out skills training and occupation before retiring to a life of comfort after her kids joined the military and gave Mamma the bonuses they received by agreeing to go and kill innocent people in Iraq.

Mothers would have us believe that she was at one time a Catholic nun, who broke her vows to become a pole-dancing stripper (with no do-do's) in some smoke filled bar full of slobbering drunks groping stuff greenbacks into her panties.
I wonder if she kept any part of the Habit for a rather kinky effect? Now I have no problem with Catholic nuns, they have a better reputation than Catholic priests, Nor do I have a problem with women who take their clothes of to sexually arouse men, I just have a hard time reconciling the breaking of a vow of chastity to go stripping in a night club for the purpose of sexually arousing men.

Clumpy let's not forget the saga of the teeth lost in Walmart! We endured weeks the sibilant sounds through flapping gums as she chanted "I love my Bussssh" I am still left wondering if the teeth fell into the potato salad at the self serve, or she left them on a table after removing them to suck on a chocolate nut cookie, either way a revolting experience for whomever made the discovery.

I can almost excuse people like Mother's whom I see has having diminished responsibility on the grounds of insanity. But for other Americans to still be supporting the evils of your Republican Govt, which has taken the evils of all past Govts to a new level, I say they are no better than the war criminals they support.

Jesus Claus said...

PENIS!

JC

That's to keep Mothers out of the comments ;)

Anonymous said...

You missed out stripper nun that put her own kid stripping on paltalk cams for $10 bucks.

Stupid SQAW!

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